Friday, April 5, 2013

Connection with the baby

There are four types of closeness to the baby during the first year of life to learn to feel your mom

For any important matter in life is a good start. And when it comes to the development of a human being, a good start in the psychological sense means establishing quality relationship between mother and baby. Although there is nothing more natural than a harmonious duo that make up the child and his mother, often in practice, and we see them neskladizmeńĎu. For some reason it happens is that mommy, despite all the effort and love for the infant, no sleep to meet his needs or adequately recognize the signals that it sends to her.

This is not thought to meet the needs of the child for eating, sleeping or changing clothes, but the quality of the emotional connection that establishes a mother and her child. In fact, there are 4 types of closeness to the baby during the first year of life, learn to feel for his mom, and they are:

* Safe - The shape of this relationship is experiencing a newborn mother as a secure base that provides love and affection at every moment: when care, games, cuddling, massaging ... These are moms who like to sing and talk to their children and often have contact with them face to face. Thanks to its robust and secure link they have with such a mother, children believe in their own abilities, which allows them to successfully perform all of the following developmental tasks set before them. In case you are separated from his mother, sure children experience grief related, but are also able to comfort themselves relatively quickly, and after returning moms express joy.

* Avoiding - This is the one form of bondage in which the mother was psychologically either physically, does not satisfy the baby's need for close. These moms is difficult to establish, especially to maintain, face to face contact, especially when the child wants. They can be very conscientious in the care of their children often play with him and be filled with emotion when talking about their babies. However, if their child is seeking closer and closer contact - they are not able to withstand - quickly rose to remove it from the wings, too soon interrupted by a hug, etc. ... To separate, their children do not cry and do not rise up, and when they met again ignore them. Also, children with these experiences are not careful in contact with foreign people, suffer when left alone, and in relationships with peers are more difficult to fit.

* Anxiety - This sort of relationship with the baby's mother is the result of a situation where the mother is sometimes available to the child and responds to their needs, and sometimes it does not. Eventually, the child learns that the mother is unstable and unreliable person in terms of support. That's why children become anxious regarding uncertain and timid, and their self-confidence, self-esteem and motivation to explore the environment depend on how much their mother approves of this. It can be said that such children develop a dependency on mothers and their attitudes, and the like are set and the other adults in their environment. On occasions when separated from their mothers these kids express strong protest, and very difficult to console, and the re-contact with her alternately express affection and anger. Such situations are particularly noticeable in some instances very difficult adaptation of the child to the collective and require professional help.

* Disorganized - fortunately rare form of relationship in which the mother is extremely inconsistent in meeting the needs of the child and in doing so has no strategy to which the child is at least occasionally can count. Such a mother is both a source of comfort and fear for their child, so we can see similar behavior with their children - difficulty concentrating, following the rules and the like.
As you can see, the only "safe" form of child attachment provides adequate material for building a healthy personality. Be sure to form it, because of how much you will succeed depends largely on the kind of partnership and friendship to develop your child, but also to what will be a parent one day it will be my children.

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